Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
