i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
