it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
