I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle