just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
