STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
