Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize
