I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize