First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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