So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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