only if we run a train.
done.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize
