The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize