We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
True college students do jello shots in the library
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