she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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