Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
