Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
well most of my day revolves around power hour
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize