He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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