A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
