its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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