How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
