it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Be still, my beating vagina.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
