she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
