If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
We have started to decorate penises.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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