dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
