This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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