Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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