Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
