the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
