so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
