Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
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