A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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