Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
