Texts From Last Night

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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule

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  (906): Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule http://tfl.nu/j8zx
  Replies (1) Good night (1253) Bad night (520)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub.  I was in it.

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  (231): Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub.  I was in it. http://tfl.nu/n970
  Replies (29) Good night (488) Bad night (1683)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.

  (214): View more from Texas

  so how much did i say i owed you?

  (972): View more from Texas

  $5 and a new fuck buddy.

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  (972): so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards. (214): so how much did i say i owed you? (972): $5 and a new fuck buddy. http://tfl.nu/zurg
  Replies (21) Good night (3230) Bad night (735)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.

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  (360): whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind. http://tfl.nu/pllx
  Replies (24) Good night (5539) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways

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  (904): we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways http://tfl.nu/vdwk
  Replies (6) Good night (4198) Bad night (1171)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  when i was alone, his dick was there for me...

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  (901): when i was alone, his dick was there for me... http://tfl.nu/g7ma
  Replies (32) Good night (5031) Bad night (1221)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.

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  (281): i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night. http://tfl.nu/0cve
  Replies (71) Good night (1522) Bad night (6286)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"

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  (540): you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out" http://tfl.nu/77z0
  Replies (17) Good night (4900) Bad night (1771)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.

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  (402): Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low. http://tfl.nu/bkkz
  Replies (9) Good night (1433) Bad night (1708)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  death...100% death...what r u planning.

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  (269): Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip? (313): death...100% death...what r u planning. http://tfl.nu/azwl
  Replies (9) Good night (1311) Bad night (1777)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.

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  (604): After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me. http://tfl.nu/m19j
  Replies (5) Good night (1627) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love

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  (720): Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love http://tfl.nu/8heh
  Replies (3) Good night (610) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"

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  (647): I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!" http://tfl.nu/1iw3
  Replies (3) Good night (2008) Bad night (325)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  You have a very discerning palate.

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  (410): It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze. (301): You have a very discerning palate. http://tfl.nu/r2sj
  Replies (11) Good night (781) Bad night (810)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship

  (1-503): View more from Oregon

  A tequila worm?

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  (503): Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship (1-503): A tequila worm? http://tfl.nu/a648
  Replies (3) Good night (544) Bad night (287)

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