Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it

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(706): View more from Georgia

She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.

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(224): View more from Illinois

You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.

(630): View more from Illinois

Thats like the definition of a good friend

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(860): View more from Connecticut

Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."

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(360): View more from Washington

Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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(705): View more from Ontario

He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.

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(+61): View more from Australia

i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.

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