i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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