i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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