Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
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