Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
