Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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