I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
