Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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