Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize