You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
