Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
soo... how was my night?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
