There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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