U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
