P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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