I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize