I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize