The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
