On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
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