adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Everything about him screamed your future.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
